life in the old lane

Took my camera out anyhow today.

The Woman Who Doesn’t Fit In… That would be me. Don’t worry about be not fitting in. I have always been one of those (Wo)Men Who Don’t FIt In – for those of you who never worked in Alaska – A little Robert Service, please:

Theirs is the curse of the gypsy blood,
And they don’t know how to rest.
If they just went straight they might go far;
They are strong and brave and true;
But they’re always tired of the things that are,
And they want the strange and new.

I have never fit in – anywhere, I am cool with that.

And, in that vane – Next week I am going to try an assault on the dress code in the “Formal Dining Room”. Just because it is there… And be cause they have a dress code. For dining in the Jefferson Dining Room we ask that residents and their guest dress appropriately — no jeans, shorts or T-shirts. NOTICE – It says NOTHING about yoga pants. Heck 99.9% of the women here wear elastic waisted knit pants – will they even notice yoga pants? Stay turned.

And whilst on the subject of not fitting in. This is one of the events next week:

 

Well, it has been a year. I survived. Now it is time to tuck Carlton safely away in my heart and move on. To where ever “on” is.

Note to Carlton: You missed a lot this year. You would have been annoyed with me for throwing money at some problems. For not “Letting time be my friend”. Well, dearest – time isn’t always MY friend. Throwing money at the Asylum problem got me settled in a suitable apartment in a timely manner…

I have hawked your investments – but not as obsessively as you did. I am thinking about adding a CPA to my “team”. I know you consider lawyers and accounts and investment people a waste of money. But, I want to vet my team members – while I still have most of my marbles.

You would have been a little put out by the fuss that the AA people made over your departure – You would have been muttering “Principals and Personalities”. “I am just another bozo on the bus”. (Like you were EVER on ANY bus!)

I hoped to find a note to me in your “stuff” – You didn’t believe in leaving notes to the survivors. Just like you didn’t believe in funerals or memorial services… But I did find that you copied Mary Alice Ramisht’s sappy poem and left it in your “Death” folder:

To Those Whom I love & Those Who Love Me

When I am gone, release me, let me go.
I have so many things to see and do,
You must not tie yourself to me with tears
Be happy that I have had so many years

I gave you my love, you can only guess
How much you gave me in happiness
I thank you for the love each have shown
But now it is time I travelled on alone

So grieve a while for me, if grieve you must
Then let your grief be comforted by trust
It is only for a while that we must part
So bless the memories in your heart

I will not be far away, for life goes on
So if you need me, call and I will come
Though you cannot see or touch me, I will be near
And if you listen with your heart, you will hear
All of my love around you soft and clear

Then, when you must come this way alone
I will greet you with a smile and welcome home

You liked sappy. This will suffice as the note that I looked for for an entire year and I am ready for the next act.

Carlton – I love you. I always will. I still wear my wedding ring. I always will. I miss you. I always will. Thank you for all the love that we shared along the way.

October 3, 2014, Halloween Day 3 of 31.

And now, I am going to get out of my leggings and sweatshirt – put on some real clothes and go down and have dinner and free wine with the other inmates.

 

52 weeks ago today – I came home from work at about 1230 and found Carlton very dead. Today, I came home to a new home. It was raining and I was driven home by a co-worker. Last year it was sunny and I walked. I was fine. I figure that I’ll be fine tomorrow too. Because – if Carlton thought for one minute that I was moping around – he would be off that autopsy table at Georgetown – and back here kicking my butt. Reminding me that “misery is optional”, telling me to make a “gratitude list”, saying “nobody is promised tomorrow – so get on with life”…

So – I am not miserable. Or even sad. I enjoyed being driven home. Had tomato soup and mac & cheese for lunch. Had a nice phone visit with a friend in Kona. Tried out the asylum pool. It is very large for this type building – maybe 25 meters. I swam laps for 15 minutes. Then tried out the jacuzzi. Came back to the apartment and read until going down for happy hour – beer and cheese and stuffed mushrooms for me. Decided that was dinner. I was about socialized out by then. Oatmeal up in the OBC sounded pretty good – and it was.

The Asylum hallways shout “little old lady”. But, I am where Carlton wanted me to be.

The rain is supposed to continue tomorrow – I’ll go to yoga or not – depending on the weather.

And on October 2, 2014 – Halloween Day 2 of 31, everything was just ducky with Mr C and me. And that I think is the lesson. Nobody is promised tomorrow. And, I am so glad and everything was rock solid between us. Nothing needed saying, no sins of omission or commission required amends. I have no regrets.

If you believe the sign in the elevator lobby – it will be the end of life on the planet if i don’t “Prepare for Hurricane Joaquin”. I am suppose to fill my bathtub with water. (Does it count if I fill my shower stall?) I am suppose to remove large items from my balcony. (OK, I’ll put them in my bathtub.) And, fill my gas tank with gasoline. (Would filling my tank with booze work)

The TV weather guys are predicting monsoonal rains. I am not worried.

The little sofa arrived today. I like it.

Oct 1, 2014, Halloween Day 1 of 31, I was happily starting a series of Halloween photos. All things considered the series came out pretty good.

 

Logged 6.5 miles on the fitbit. Went to work, had lunch at Starbucks, went to the old apartment building to pay the rip off water/sewer/trash bill. Better to just pay it than get my panties in a bunch. No future in jousting over a bill with Sam Zell. Stopped off and topped up my metro/bus fare card.

Then I went to the dentist where my teeth were declared “stable”. That is as good as it gets. I hopped on the 41 bus for the ride home. Spiked punch and cake were being served in the lobby for no apparent reason when I arrived. Did punch. Skipped cake. Got a little takeout salad. Looking forward to some down time in the OBC tonight. (Which means I am going to miss Oktoberfest – well if it isn’t October and if beer isn’t on the menu – it isn’t Oktoberfest.)

September 30, 2014 must not have been noteworthy. No blog entry for that day.

Rain, rain, and more rain on tap. I may call out of work on account of rain.

A little brightness in a gray day… Son-in-law found a never seen image from 10 years ago. Aren’t backup’s wonderful?

Most days I curse the general bus riding population. If there are 10 riders, 9 of them will have to fumble around all their pockets and bags to come up enough cash for the fare. Why can’t they have a fine high balance fare card like I do? Of course if you are a minimum wage worker you can not have $25 tied up in bus rides that you might never take. Well, today as I was running to catch a bus – I was damn glad that all these riders were holding up the bus – fumbling around looking for cash… for their fares. Getting to work used to take 30 minutes by foot, now it takes about an hour, and 2 busses and you had best not miss either of the busses. (I think I could walk it in a little over an hour.)

Had dinner a big table of Little Old Ladies. It was good.  And, the ladies told me that every on in “our” building was very sociable – but only outside of our apartments. They said that no one would ever just “drop by”. That is a very good thing.

Tomorrow afternoon is the dentist. And then I might have to take Thursday off – my sofa is scheduled to arrive. I hope it isn’t too big. It’s not like I can send it back.

All was good on September 29, 2014 – Happy Trails – And all is good today. No 1st class tickets to Hawai’i, yet.

Bingo 2Night at 7PM. The dining rooms were deserted by 6:45PM. Let the record show – I did not go to Bingo. I did have blackened grouper for dinner. Still adjusting to life as an inmate.

Moving to the asylum did not make me into a wildlife photographer. But, there are birds in the little garden out front. How hard will it be the haul the tripod out?

I got up at 5AM and was at work by 7AM. I left the OBC at about 610. I bused some and walked some.

So far, so good as I approach the one year anniversary of Carlton’s death…

September 28, 2014 – Lazy Last Summer of September – everything was “fine”

Interesting times: Running water found on Mars. The Pope was received like a rock star in DC. No, it was bigger than that – more like back in the day when the Redskins won the Superbowl. And, the crazies seem to have taken over the Republican Party – at least the part that runs the House of Representatives. Interesting times.

Went to on walkabout today and took my camera. Nothing great. But, it was nice to not do anything moving-wise.  I missed lunch. Not a problem. Still got a nice avocado and grilled salmon salad. I have to be careful with all this unlimited food available 12 hours a day. Not cruiseship. But close. Don’t want to require an entire new wardrobe. Dinner will be oatmeal and yogurt in the OBC.

I am going to have trouble this week. Because 52 weeks ago Carlton was alive and planning on staying that way. We had our last Sunday together a year ago.

And, September 27, 2014 – A Few Fall Grays – recalled October 3, 2013 – Accidental Panorama – that was when the wheels really fell off…

Note to Carlton: I really am OK. And thank you for getting me on my way to the asylum.

Time to catch up on emails and paperwork. Then “dinner”.

I might not have taken any pictures – but I worked my okole off today. All day, until 4PM when I started getting ready for the little block party that was happening in my honor at 4:30. One thing about the asylum – you can go to a party and do dinner and still be back in the old bat cave – in jammies – by 8PM.

But, I am now all moved in. My closets are even almost done. I took some stuff down to the storage cage. stuff like milk crates. and baskets. and shelve organizing thingies. stuff that will go to donation or trash.

But I am tired and am taking tomorrow OFF. This being a religious place – most of the residents seem to head out to church on sunday, A couple of retired ministers live on my floor. But, they don’t seem to mind having a pagan in their midst.

My apartment turned out fine. It is one room – plus a tiny bathroom and a big closet and a barely there closet. But, it is all I need. It is not “cozy”. It has an almost industrial or loft type feel to it – don’t know when that comes from. Maybe it is the shape of the room. Maybe it is my eclectic furniture collection. Who knows.

September 27, 2014 – A Few Fall Colors – we were enjoying a few days of grace.

Day off tomorrow. Will figure something to do – even nothing at all – tomorrow. Will take some pictures – weather permitting.

Big sign in “my” neighborhood. But, I don’t have a phone – so, no one can call. Not a bad thing, I am sure. Zuchini bread arrived at my door. And, the folks from “my” neighborhood are having a little welcome party for me tomorrow. Each floor seems to consider itself a “neighborhood”. A neighborhood of maybe 25-30 folks.

So what did I do today – well, I didn’t go to work. Need some time to find my stuff and get organized.

• Got up at the usual time – 0530 and had breakfast in the Old Bat Cave.
• Organized the bathroom a little more to my liking.
• Organized the kitchen.
• Went walkabout around the neighborhood (outside the building).
• Stopped by Bed Bath and Beyond for “stuff”
• Wandered over to Trader Joe’s for a little food. This is the same Trader Joe’s that I patronized 15 years ago.
• That was about a 3 mile round trip walkabout.
• Picked up a take out lunch at the asylum bistro.
• Napped a little.
• Worked on setting up my computer and desk area.
• My boss paid a surprise visit. She is the first outsider to see the Old Bat Cave.
• I decided I wanted to fix my own dinner, so I did… If I eat asylum food twice a day – I’ll need a new wardrobe.
• And that is about all.
• 10,420 Steps on the FitBit.

So, you want to see the new digs…

 

And that is about all there is to it.

Note to Carlton: Your sword is safely mounted on the wall – just like you liked it hung. And, your little steam engine and chrome plated bolt are in the “living room” – or as I call it – the North End.

September 25, 2014 – Back in this century, I took a “formal” picture of Carlton. If I had known I would have done a much better job.

And the move happened. My “people” got my stuff here. Took the stuff I don’t need/have room for “somewhere”. And unpacked my stuff and put it “somewhere”. The operative word is “somewhere”.

The furniture fits. That is a good thing. My job tonight is to find my toothbrush. And toothpaste. I found my computer gear. The Airness says “mouse needs new batteries”. Well, suck it up Airness – your mouse will get new batteries when I find them.

The people put everything that looked “kitcheny” in the kitchen area – somewhere. And everything that looked “bathroomy” in the bathroom – which is to say it is stuffed under the sink. The rest of the “stuff” got “stuffed” into my closets.

Pictures of the new digs tomorrow.

For now – about 12 hours after and 3 miles from the pictures above.

Not too shabby a view – But, I have to stand up to see it. From my chair or my bed – all I can see is sky. Nothing wrong with sky.

September 24, 2014, Back in the Last Century, I was thinking about Hawai’i. Time to think about Hawai’i this year.

September 23, 2014 Today, I am an old woman, One year ago today, I made a deposit for Carlton and I to move into the asylum. Today, I made the final payment for my Old Bat Cave. They finished it up a little after noon today.

Took a few “valuables” to the Old Bat Cave. My camera lenses, Carlton’s sword, Sam’s Au Hoy’s wonderful lauhala pāpale, the 8783 Propeller Stool.

Then I came home (for the next 16 hours home) and decided that some more stuff needed to get the green – not going to the old bat cave – tape job.

And, I didn’t have any time left in the day to mope.

BTW, the Old Bat Cave is about 23 by 16 feet. Not big. But heaps better as one room. It was 2 rooms when I found it.