Author: Peg

Is it only a month since I last admired the moon and venus?

March 27

It has been one hell of a month. Things are still really grim. But, we made it through another month. Or, maybe, I should say we had another month together.

Another month to:

Enjoy every sandwich: Buffalo chicken with crunchy iceburg lettuce in a flour tortilla. I might make cheese burgers for dinner. A double sandwich day?

As for my person fitness craze. Knocked out 5 miles today. And did a little yoga too.

A couple of weeks after the elegant Yoshino and Akebono Cherry Trees bloom, the gaudy, over the top Kwanzan Cherry Trees pop out.

Today is a day of nots.

• I did not stand up for 5 hours at work.
• I did not walk 5 miles. Did walk 3.5
• Mr C did not get an operation.
• I was not tired.
• Mr C was not all cut up.

Enjoy Every Sandwich: Tuna with blue cheese and tomatoes and a little iceberg lettuce. On whole wheat pita.

I love crab apple blossoms – and apparently so does this bee-type thing.

I am tired today. Real tired. Stood up all morning at work. Think I am too old to be a shop girl! Only logged 4.5 miles walking. I wonder how many miles a day “should” a 70 year old lady walk? Enough complaining.

Today was a fine day for flower watching.

Enjoy every sandwich: Roast beef, bacon, cheese on ciabatta roll.

We are still with Treatment Plan B. No surgery. Just radiation. Radiation starts next Wednesday.

We aren’t going to talk about Merkel Cell or medical treatments until next Wednesday. We still might talk about things that need to be done “just in case Plan B fails”. I am thinking maybe we should go to Kona when radiation is done. No matter what.

Got my 5 miles of walking in today. Thank you FitBit. Have I mentioned that I loath exercise. Yeah, I though so.

Enjoy every sandwich: Turkey with melted provolone and apple chutney.

Thank you, Mother Earth for putting up with your disrespectful children.

What a day. After a morning of handwringing, angst and the F word by Carlton … Me rushing home from work. More angst. At about 3:30 this afternoon, at the hospital,  Mr C said just said NO. No surgery. Then signed up for a 6 week course of radiation – starting next Wednesday. And he was told he could cancel his appointment with the dreaded oncologist.

This is not the recommended course of treatment. But, for Carlton, it is the “best” care. He is completely freaked out by the amount of skin grafting that MIGHT be required to close the proposed cut to the top of his head. So, it will be the Nuclear Option… I am totally OK with his choice.

Stay tuned.

Enjoy Every Sandwich: Turkey & Provolone on Wheat w/lettuce and tomato.

Some days, nothing happens. These are good days. Today was a good day.

Carlton went out to lunch. I knocked out my 5 miles walking. Took some flower pictures along the way. One of Carlton’s girl friends came by for a visit.  Nice normal day.

Enjoy Every Sandwich: Carlton Bacon Cheese Burger with fries – this was his lunch. As for me, no sandwich today.

No chocolate bunnies for us this year. But, we do have dark chocolate bars and chocolate covered almonds.

Enjoying a last day of denial. Maybe we can squeeze out another denial day tomorrow. But, after that back to grim reality. Surgery is Friday. Not a moment too soon.

I didn’t do much today. My normal kitchen cleaning and laundry. Some yoga. And, I didn’t let the fitbit nag me into walking five miles.

Mr C went for a bike ride and to AA.

Enjoy Every Sandwich: Turkey and Swiss with guacamole and tomatoes.

Here I am, not looking too shabby for 70 years old. (thanks Sue). Just the sort of encouragement I need to remember “Peg eating a donut will not extend Carlton’s life one instant”.

We are having a nice day. Trying to ignore “what might happen next”. We might as well enjoy a couple of days of denial.

Enjoy Every Sandwich: Hana Hou – tuna melt for Mr C and chicken salad for me.

Note to Laurent: Hana Hou is Hawaiian for repeat, do again, encore. It comes from the old plantation days. Sugar cane was planted from cuttings. And replanted or “hana hou” several more times. Hana means work and hou in this context means again.

Retail Therapy for Me: I got a little FitBit Zip. We’ll see if it can guilt me into walking 5 miles most days. Mr C doesn’t get retail therapy.

Thanks for all the birthday greetings. Carlton was 3 years old – 1938 – and the dog was “Jerry”.

Today, for me and for my doctor, Carlton agree to visit the Wound Care Clinic at our hospital. The doctor and I fear that Mr C’s chest – which is where all this started in March – is still harboring bacteria. Carlton did not want to go there Not. One. Bit. But, for us, he went. The nurse thinks we might be right. She drew some circles on his chest, wrote him a script for yet more antibiotics and told him to come back on Tuesday.

We were assured that infection or not, surgery can still happen on Friday. Surgery can not happen soon enough.

I think my sinus problem is getting better.

 

Enjoy Every Sandwich: Cheese Burgers today!

Today is Carlton’s 79th birthday. Number One on his bucket list is an 80th birthday.

He had another biopsy from his head today. If it is Merkel – it can come out when the other one is excised. Surgery scheduled for next Friday at 0700 hours.

For most of the day, my sinus infection and Mr C’s disposition were improved. He completely nixed any talk of going to any other hospital or doctor. He says that our hospital is “good enough”. If he were 69, I would fight him on that. Since he is 79, I’ll support any decision he makes.

For most of the day, my sinus infection was better. But, it is getting yucky again.

Enjoy Every Sandwich: Tuna Sandwiches. And, a side order of veggies.

I think he wants to just give up and die. If that is what he wants. I’ll be supportive. But, I hope he will either get over this “better dead” phase. Or at least sign onto some sort of palliative care program. Otherwise, I fear he will end up all covered in infected lesions. Sort of like leprosy.And I am no St Marianne Cope. Not even close.

And, I suddenly developed a raging sinus infection.

Enjoy Every Sandwich. Today we had chicken, Monterey Jack cheese, chutney, lettuce on a nice soft roll.

I took this picture thru a double pane of glass. But, he was too pretty to pass up. I think this is the male of “our” pair. A pair of starlings inhabit a hole in the side of our building. It is maybe 4 feet down from our balcony ledge. The pair chase off any other birds that come around. Mom and Dad and any number of fledglings spend many hours in the early morning and evening perched on our balcony ledge. No babies yet. But much coming and going from the nest area. And lots of bird songs. Starling have a lot to say. And they say it all night long. We like them.

I did not go with Mr C to see the plastic surgeon. Maybe I should have. She scared my poor guy. Telling him that he might need a complex skin flap. And, that was outside her pay grade. She can give you a heart shaped butt, but can not do a skin flap? Oh well. I don’t think a skin flap graft is the worse thing that can or will happen. But, it scared Mc C almost witless.

And everyday that creature on top of his head gets bigger and digs deeper. OK, Peg, time to summon the inner forces and move forward. But, which way is forward. This sucks.

Enjoy Every Sandwich: Turkey, Swiss, and Cole Slaw on chabatta.